Friday was such an exciting day! First of all, our sweet little Ashton turned 6 years old! It is amazing to me how quickly the years have gone by already. We took him to Stevie B's pizza (his choice) and he got Cars 2...he's probably already watched it 10 times!!!
Mark and I had our interviews at Bethany Christian Services. They started around 9:30 and ended about 3:00. It was a long day, but I enjoyed every minute of it. Debby interviewed me first while Mark watched 2 videos about adoption. In the interview, she asked questions about a questionnaire we filled out when we first got there that asked about drug history, abuse history, counseling history, and pregnancy history. I'm afraid I'm not very interesting from any of those stand points. She also asked about how my childhood was and how I get along with the in-laws! I'm blessed to have such wonderful family, both on my side and my husband's. We grabbed lunch at Corky's BBQ, which has become habit while hanging out at Bethany. When we came back, Mark was then interviewed while I watched the videos. We were both humored by the fact that Debby was intrigued with Mark's past, and we marvelled at how much of a different man he is today, thanks to the Lord and His Grace!!!
The first video was a documentary of an adoptive woman's journey to find her biological family and heal the open wound in her heart that she has never been able to close. It was actually a sad video because when she finds her mom and brothers and sisters, she can't communicate with them because she doesn't speak their language, and the culture is completely different, so she still feels out of place. Adoptive mother kept reminding her subtly that SHE was her mother, not this other lady that birthed her. I hope I never act like that, I don't think it made her daughter feel any better. Any way, in the end, she basically had to agree to just accept her adoptive parents as her true parents, mainly because she knew the relationship with her mom in Korea would be distant. It really made me think at what age will my adoptive child question where he came from and how much grief and loss will he suffer as a result of being taken out of Hong Kong and placed in a family that looks different than him. I will have open communication with him about this....for sure!!!
The second video was basically a round table discussion of several adopted adults and their struggle with fitting in due to being in a transcultural family. Most of the people in this video were African American who were raised by white parents. But I could see how it might be awkward if you were the only person from a different ethnic background. I took from this video that I need to make sure I surround myself and my child with people who look like him so he won't feel like he's the only one that looks that way. I'm already prepared for this anyway!!!
Our next meeting is December 2 at our house! Anyone wanna volunteer to clean my house??? JK! We do need to get new carpet in Ashton's room before Debby comes....it looks terrible in there right now! Well....that's all for now! I'll post soon :)
I can't believe it was so long! I will warn you too because my SW didn't warn me, she looked in all our closets and the shed this time. That is where I put everything I didn't have time to put away so would have been nice to know ahead of time! But, she found no meth labs just laundry and toys. Second, to make you child not feel out of place, you will just have to adopt several from HK to balance out your family!!! We will have two but so far that is all my husbands thinks we can handle but we will see :)
ReplyDeleteYall are in my prayers!!!
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